Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Not Me

Seems my kids have a new friend. He tailed my kids home one day from school. He's a pest, run amuck in my household and won't leave. He was totally uninvited and he’s rude. Apparently, he's been frequenting homes across America. Now, normally I am a non-violent kind of Mom. I prefer to scream so loud at my children that I set the house alarm off. But, seriously, this nuisance needs to be exterminated. His name is Not Me. I'm sure anyone that has kids knows him. He's the one that probably broke your favorite vase but "didn’t mean to", or spilt maple syrup on the table and didn't wipe it up, so when one of your other kids sat down to do their homework, the paper stuck to the table then tore apart into shreds when you tried to remove it. Not Me has also taught my kids some new choice words. He'll stand directly behind the Tank, hiding himself like a coward, and drop the "F" bomb. Then he'll run right off before I can catch sight of him. This is his M. O. He's got his disappearing act down to a science. We'll it's time to pull out the big guns and make Not Me disappear for good. Next time Not Me decides to write on my walls with crayon, everyone will be punished. It's time my kids learned what my Mom taught me- You're guilty by association. So, choose your friends wisely.